Which Epic Villain Are You, Based On Your Zodiac?


Mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the vilest of us all? Ever wondered what it would be like if the dormant Beelzebubs tucked deep within us, were to someday drop in for a little chat? Let’s face it, there’s a dark side in all of us and most of us would opportunely take our shadowy halves to the grave than let the world have an inkling of them. So much so, that even when we are reading up on our zodiac signs, we would rather focus on the positives lest some honesty seeps in about who we really are! Zodiacs, usually give us a fair idea about our personality traits based on our birth months – for instance, we know that most water signs are emotional, air signs are the intellectuals, earth signs are practical whereas fire signs are the ones exuding the most passion.

However, each sign also has a latent shady edge – a capacity to be a real piece of work. But then again, what would life be without a little villainy? We do need our Lady Macbeths, our Saurons and our various fictional pirates to add some much-needed charisma – because good without evil is no good at all! Also, let’s not forget, there’s always something deliciously tempting about maleficence – the more forbidden the province, the greater is the need for an encounter. Now, if you are ready to greet your alter ego, read on to find out which epic villain you might be, according to your zodiac.

12. Leo – The Riddler

For this ego-maniacal proud sign, flamboyant slayings and military coups are a speciality – they thrive for the spotlight of infamy. Remember The Riddler from the Batman series? The very thing! Known for his purple domino mask and green question mark-covered costume – either as a green body-hugging cat ensemble or a green suit with a bowler hat and his unique question-marked shaped cane – Edward Nigma aka The Riddler takes delight in incorporating riddles and puzzles into his plots, and leaves them as clues for the authorities to solve. With his self-conscious use of gimmicks, he makes his crimes ornate and ostentatious, feeding his essentially Leo-pride. He loves to be the centre of attraction and his misdeeds are all singularly directed towards achieving that.

11. Virgo – Lord Voldemort

Tom Marvolo Riddle, otherwise known as Lord Voldemort, has to be the most awesome bad guy of all times. He is by far, the embodiment of all evil not only in the Potter universe but in the history of fantasy literature. Ridiculously stubborn and vengeful, as most Virgo are, he represents all flaws essentially base and human. His need to control others makes him disturbingly obsessed with trivial details and feeds his sole purpose of creating discord in the world. Ruled by the Virgin, his penchant for destruction can predominantly be charged upon his sun sign. His bit of self-hatred too may be attributed to the fact that he was once disarmingly handsome, competent and charming. Voldemort is motivated by immortality, superiority and most of all racial-cleansing, which also makes him a one-of-a-kind anti-hero.

10. Gemini – The Joker

The unrest and uncertainty of the Gemini is best recapitulated by The Joker. His methods are unpredictable and incalculable and he does things according to his own sense of twisted logic. He is a psychotic anarchist mastermind, who loves to portray himself as the king of chaos. He draws a fine line between heroism and vigilantism is his psychopathic, mass-murdering antics. Often described as the “schizophrenic clown with zero empathy”, he is however extremely effective in both mental and strategic planning. Aided by his gruesome Glasgow smile, he adds sick comedy to all his crimes and misdeeds – something that most Gemini are adept at. The sign of the twin, the dualities of the Gemini are what make them the most ambiguous killers.

9. Cancer – Venom

Cancer are the deadliest of horoscopes in the zodiac. Their mental instability makes them repeat offenders much like The Venom in Spider-Man. The Venom is an acquired identity of the alien Symbiote in the comic series. This symbiote was the 998th generation of the feral Klyntar, a goo-like parasitic organism from outer space. The Klyntar were later imprisoned by their own kind for displaying unusual dreams to protect its hosts instead of dominating them like tools. The sign of the Venom the crab, which more or less explains why they are nearly impossible to crack. They dangerously oscillate between the ebbs and flows and easily grab the unsuspecting in their clutches. Crimes of passion are frequent in the house of Cancer. If the cloying crab develops a taste for killing, they are likely to strike again!

8. Scorpio – Hannibal Lecter

The worst kinds of genius are the evil ones, and Hannibal Lecter definitely qualifies for a top spot. He is the archetypal Scorpio with a brilliant and methodical mind though often paranoid. Possessed of a keen imagination, this Scorpio super-villain plots the most elaborate and gruesome crimes. And of course, besides everything else, there is also the fact that Lecter is a cannibal. The man solves complex murders from jail, while doing time for the insane murders that he has already committed. Often villains are sufficiently fictional and audiences tend to suspend their disbelief in order to deal with the horror – but that is not Lecter. With Hannibal, people can feel that he is a bit too real for comfort, and therefore all the more scary.

7. Capricorn – Apocalypse (En Sabah Nur)

Grim and single-minded, the sign of Capricorn creates super-villains with the most staying power – a lot like Apocalypse from the X-Men chains. Deeply resentful of their inability to love and be loved by others, the evil Capricorn apply themselves to an inclusive strategy of world-domination. The Apocalypse too, obsessed with the survival of the fittest is persistent on global tyranny. He thinks mutants like himself are superior to humans and thus humans should hardly be treated as anything more than cattle. For centuries, the Apocalypse would wander the world – driven by the tireless perseverance of the Capricorn, making civilisations worship him as a god and manipulating them into fighting wars – testing their strengths and justifying his actions, claiming he was improving the world for them.

6. Libra – The Mandarin

Born in China before the Communist revolution, The Mandarin is a genius scientist and a superhumanly-skilled martial artist. He was born to a wealthy Chinese father and an English aristocratic mother, both of whom died when he was very young and in the hope of finding means to avenge himself – in the predicable Libra-way – upon the civilisation that had taxed him and rendered him homeless, he became who he is. Displaying strong characteristics of a Libra, he is often categorised as a megalomaniac, attempting to conquer the world on several occasions yet also possessing a strong sense of honour. At certain times, he is a great modern antagonist but at others, he is a despicable worshipper at the altar of his own narcissism.

5. Sagittarius – Green Goblin

Self-indulgent and laid-back, the Sagittarius villains usually kick off more evil deeds than they actually care to finish. To become truly successful, this sign needs to learn to focus their monstrosity in one clear direction, or they will always end up engaging newer henchmen to clean up after their mess – much like the Green Goblin. Originally an unscrupulous industrial head of Oscorp, Norman Osborn alias the Green Goblin, took a serum which enhanced his physical abilities (strength, mobility, stamina and healing progression) and intellect, and in the process also drove him to insanity. He adopted a Halloween-themed façade, dressing in a goblin costume and rode on a bat-shaped “Goblin Glider”. He used an arsenal of high-tech weapons to terrorize NYC, yet lacked conviction as a truly evil villain.

4. Aquarius – Loki

The famed Aquarian affinity for friendship and community might make this sign look weak for super-villains but let us not forget Loki – the half-brother of Asgardian Thor, the God of Thunder – and what this man is capable of. Going by their sign, most evil Aquarians are unintentionally so, but manage to wreak considerable havoc and annihilation when they mean to. True to his sign, Loki is every bit as destructive but he is still more of an anti-hero than an out and out villain. He is a natural when it comes to controlling the dark arts and knows how to put that to his advantage. When into his adulthood, Loki gained the reputation as the God of Mischief but gradually his tricks augmented from mischievous to downright malicious and evil when the stakes involved the throne of Asgard.

3. Pisces – Norman Bates

The Pisces super-villain is most adjusted to the finesses of human interaction and therefore accomplished at the most sadistic forms of evil. Remember Norman Bates from Psycho? He would be a classic example. An American serial killer and the proprietor of The Bates Motel in California, Norman Bates loved stuffed animals – and spying on his female guests. Not just that, in his ruptured psyche, he is also his dead mother – the mother he is known to have killed and kept mummified in the basement of his house for many years. He used to dress up in her clothes and murder the women as his mother, to prevent her naughty son from ogling at them. Most evil Pisces are created when their instinctive desire to help mankind is stunned by the disgust towards those they are trying to help, and Norman Bates is no different.

2. Aries – Sabre Tooth

Born as Victor Creed, Sabretooth is a mutant with bestial superhuman qualities, a regenerative healing factor, razor-sharp fangs and claws, aided by superhuman senses. He is known to have been a victim of the Cold War super-soldier programme Weapon X, who turned out to be a vicious assassin liable for numerous deaths both as a paid mercenary and for personal pleasure. Those born under the Zodiac sign Aries tend to imbibe SabreTooth-like attributes – thriving solely on challenge and confrontations. The fiery and cardinal forces that govern Aries make for a highly aggressive and unbalanced individual. The aggressive Aries gets hopping mad about things he cannot change or control and unleashes his fury upon whomever is nearest – much like SabreTooth. Hot-headed killers, they completely lack compassion and are hard to tame.

1. Taurus – Bellatrix Lestrange

Bellatrix Lestrange is perhaps one of the most obnoxious witches in the entire Harry Potter storyline. There are few in the history of villainy who can parallel this psychopathic Death Eater. She worships the Dark Lord and secures gratification from the anguish of innocents. But like a true Taurus, she is also charming in her brutality – personifying a permutation of power, emancipation and an unembarrassed thirst for both life and death. She consciously understands right from wrong but willingly ignores it for fun! The Taurus, like Bella, are stubborn, hedonistic and almost always the most uncompromising bullies. They are sadists, who can just kill for thrill. Supremely cold-blooded, they hardly ever give out their true intentions, revelling in sweet-talking their prey into the path of destruction.

BY  | TheTalko

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