Monogamy is complex, to say the least— especially when it comes to men. While many guys don’t want their girlfriend to have other sexual partners, they feel like they’re entitled to.
In other words, a lot of dudes want to have their cake and eat it, too. But as we all may know, that’s not how life works. So, we turned to Reddit to see what guys had to say about the matter, thinking they’d be all, well, monogamy.
Yes, seriously. Read on below.
User “RedTalon19.” “I’m 30 and this is exactly what I want. Even if its just exclusive FWB. When I was younger I’ll admit, if I had the skills/suave to swing it, I would have loved an open relationship. But that’s not what I want anymore.”
User “ericman76.” “Yes. I don’t want to share my significant other with anyone else. I won’t say that the idea of having multiple females being monogamous with me isn’t … tempting … but it’s just not reasonable. And it’s absolutely unnecessary.
It’s not that I want only one significant other per se, but I definitely don’t want my significant other being with anyone else at the same time. And monogamy is how this works, and it’s fine.”
User “gh0st32.” “I do, it makes life easier. I can focus on advancing my career as opposed to juggling 3-4 women.”
User “Colin_Bomber_Harris.” “I wouldn’t want a polygamous relationship. Monogamy is a beautiful thing when it works.”
User “halfysreddit.” “I don’t do monogamy, but I also make that clear to any woman I pursue. I’m promiscuous but I don’t ‘play’ anyone.”
User “MentalErection.” “I think a lot of people overlook this. They look at relationships too much from the physical standpoint. That connection between you and another person is beautiful and I don’t want other people coming in between that.”
User “SamwiseG14.” “I’m more interested in the connection you get with a SO in monogamy. I have nothing against people who are polyamorous or promiscuous, but from my vantage point, that has never worked out well for the emotional well being of the parties involved. Monogamy is definitely my preferred option.”
User “fireside fire.” “I’m 26 and I want a monogamous relationship more than anything. My problem is finding a woman around my same age bracket who’s also into it :/ That’s why I’ve started aiming my sights to the more mature women.”
User “Dasbman22.” “I’m very much in the ‘different strokes for different folks’ camp, so I by no means judge people who either never want the monogamous life or just want it after a certain point in life… just for me it has always made me the most fulfilled. I do attach fairly easily and quickly, and am somewhat emotionally heightened at times, so I think the ultimately fleeting nature of hookups just left me empty. Some might say I never gave that approach enough of a shot (a few flings in high school and a random hookup my first night of college)… but for the past eight and a half years I have only been single for all of four weeks (one 1.5 year relationship, and my current one which just entered year seven) and it has just felt ‘right’ this way.”
User “Dasbman22.” “Call me a romantic, call me codependent, call me what you will… but I actually much prefer the monogamous life and basically have since I was a teenager (26 now – well 27 tomorrow). Of course I fantasize about many different women in passing, and occasionally entertain the thought that a spark is felt with a female friend or acquaintance when in a relationship, but honestly giving into any of those fleeting impulses wouldn’t fulfill me the way monogamy does. As much fun and variety as I would have “playing the field”, and as much drama and punctuated periods of monotony are involved in maintaining a serious, committed LTR; I find spending my energy building something (hopefully) permanent with another person over time is ultimately what makes me most happy.”
User “God_Wills_It_.” “I don’t. I’ve tried them. It’s not right for this time in my life but I do know many many guys that do want one. In fact that’s all they want in terms of sexual relationships. You will find plenty of them here.”
Anonymous. “I don’t like sharing. Why would I want to share a person? Especially if I’m in love? I get that some people can do it, but I can’t.”
User “-M-.” “I do wish to live monogamously. I hold no interest in other women whilst in a relationship with one. I couldn’t live with myself if I cheated.”
User “Probablyhrenrai.” “I do; not only does it keep the relationship basic and uncomplicated, but it’s also the only kind that I’ll be comfortable with. It’s not just that it makes far more sense for commitment and whatnot, it’s a value thing.”
User “Linwelinax.” “I only do monogamous relationships. Any other kind of relationship is just not for me. I want to be able to commit to one person at a time and since I have my jealous moments, I’d much rather have my partner only be with me.”
Source: Rebel Circus